Neutral Ground Support Organization,
Inc.
Policy Manual
Adopted by the Board of Directors February 8, 2005
*
Page 1
[back to top]
Purpose
The Corporation is organized and will be operated exclusively for
charitable and educational purposes which shall involve (1) the relief
of the emotional, financial and social distress experienced by persons
who are widowed, divorced or separated from their spouse or significant
other; (2) instructing, training, counseling and educating widowed,
divorced or separated persons in order to assist them in overcoming the
legal, financial and emotional problems caused by and related to their
situation; and (3) increasing the awareness of the general public and
educating the public regarding the problems of widowed, separated and
divorced persons.
Group Principles and Assumptions
Neutral Ground is founded on several assumptions which underlie our
mission of providing peer support. These assumptions are a basic to
good group conduct and should be carefully considered by all group
members. They are
1. People who are experiencing a marital separation or loss of an
important relationship are probably hurting and feeling vulnerable.
They may also be experiencing a loss of self-esteem. It is very
important to recognize and respect these feelings and to provide an
atmosphere of warmth and acceptance for these men and women.
2. People have the ability to heal themselves and find their own
answers to problems when they are given the opportunity to express
their feelings in a safe and caring place.
3. People will share their feelings and experiences more freely and
openly when they know that the group respects their right of
confidentiality.
4. People share their experiences and feelings with others only to the
degree that they are able at the time; in other words, their decision
to share themselves or not must be respected.
*
Page 2
[back to top]
Neutral Ground consists of:
Rooms, halls, meetings, and coffee hour on meeting nights.
- Workshops and special programs.
- The bulletin board in the newsletter.
- The location of social events (other than First Friday
dances, which are open to the public)
- Our website, membership lists, group names, and phone
number lists.
Our reputation demands we keep all these safe and caring places.
*
Page 3
[back to top]
I. Bulletin Board and Fliers
A. Major use: information and promotional material for Neutral Ground.
B. Use of the bulletin board is a privilege extended to other groups or
individuals by Neutral Ground. Board approval is needed for a posting
on the short side of the bulletin board.
C. No stacks of fliers for outside events without board approval; they are confused with and
compete with our protected events, especially those carefully planned
by our social committee.
D. No solicitation of members for outside events or business, on these
premises without prior board approval.
*
Page 4
[back to top]
II. Facilitators
A. Facilitators may refuse to accept an individual signing up for their
group. Facilitators are to ask each group if there is anyone who has
not attended Orientation.
B. Keep group members aware of Neutral Ground sponsored educational and
social events. During group, especially closed groups, membership
should be made aware of the need for social committee members, and the
satisfactions of getting involved.
C. Much group business is at the discretion of the facilitators: group
structure and material used, activities, social events, sharing
dinners, etc.
D. Keep the facilitator coordinators informed, and if necessary, the
board, of critical group conditions.
E. Facilitators are responsible to track attendance and inform
coordinators of non-attenders or dropouts.
F. No Food or alcohol in the rooms at the church.
G. Past or current facilitators who remarry may be permitted to
continue or resume facilitating upon sanction of the board.
Facilitators who have recently ended a relationship or are in a
relationship crisis should carefully consider the possible effects of
these stressors on their ability to facilitate groups.
H. Any Facilitator who has not facilitated in five years must go
through facilitator training before resuming the duties of a
facilitator.
I. Prospective new facilitators are to be recommended by any two
facilitators who have had them in groups they have facilitated. They
are to be approved at a facilitator meeting. They are not to be
solicited by general requests for volunteers in groups.
J. Facilitators actively facilitating a group should not date members
of their group. Co-facilitators who are dating, should inform their
group at the outset of their relationship status.
K. Facilitator Privilege: If a facilitator facilitates for a minimum of
8 times, or facilitates in a open or closed group for that group’s
duration in a given membership year (July to June), he or she is
eligible for a free membership or free closed group signup fee for the
following membership year. Election of this privilege should be
communicated to our secretary at or before membership renewal time.
*
Page 5
[back to top]
III. Fiscal Policy
A. The president can spend up to $100 but must report this at the next
board meeting. If a board meeting occurs before this expenditure is
needed, the president will request board approval for expenditure.
Non-budgeted expenditures over $100 are to be tabled and action taken
at the next board meeting.
B. Committees are to prepare annual budgets, oversee financial matters
of the organization, and determine when legal counsel may be needed.
C. Members who submit bounced checks shall be contacted by letter from
the treasurer. The letter will notify them of the check and request
that the check be made good within one month. They will also be
notified that financial hardship qualifies them for a scholarship,
which can be discussed with any board member. The bounced check fee
will not be collected since most members are experiencing financial
difficulties. A person who has not requested a scholarship, and who
makes no attempt to make good on a bounced check, may not be allowed to
take a group until a resolution is reached, through a board decision.
*
Page 6
[back to top]
IV. Groups
A. Neutral ground group material is to be related to our issues of
separation, divorce, widowhood, and or adjustment to singleness. In
order to ensure up to date, quality groups consistent with the
philosophy of Neutral Ground, materials proposed as a basis for a new
group, are subject to review. Previously used materials are subject to
review at a facilitator's request. A New Materials Review committee of
three facilitators will be solicited and maintained by the Facilitator
Coordinator(s). After reviewing materials, the committee will report
within two weeks to the Coordinator(s) their opinion regarding the
appropriateness of the materials as a basis for a group. New materials
for a group should be submitted to the Committee at least one month
prior to the deadline date for the newsletter that contains group
sign-up information. This will ensure there is enough time to review
the new materials and also enough time for the new group to be prepared
before it starts (5/08). Facilitator Coordinators will maintain a file
of information about past groups, including title, books or materials
used as a basis for the group, date group was last held, facilitators,
brief description of group(such as a copy of the newsletter
description).
B. Facilitators should emphasize the importance of respecting every
member's confidentiality at all times. Firstly, group members names and
phone numbers are confidential and not for outside use. Group members
should be advised that everything that is said in the group is not to
be repeated without the permission of the member or members involved.
We know that members will continue discussions after group is ended.
But such discussion should not be about other members or other members
issues or information, without the knowledge and permission of that
member. The foregoing is redundant intentionally, because
confidentiality is extremely important to the success of Neutral
Ground's mission.
C. There will always be at least one open group and Orientation group
unavailable during registration and special programs.
D. Facilitator Coordinators will keep tabs on group members who drop
out, have poor attendance, or repeat groups many times. The names of
group members not fulfilling their commitment to attend will be sent to
the Facilitator Coordinators, to avoid possible repeaters. These people
displace others who might benefit. They may be refused admission on an
individual basis.
E. Starting Over, First Group, Rebuilding 1 and 2 are to be limited to
16 people. At the discretion of the facilitators running
psycho-educational and personal growth groups, this number can be
exceeded, in general however, it should be kept in mind that making a
group larger can be unfair to all group members.
F. A group member who misses the first two meetings of a closed group
may not be allowed to attend the group. This will be decided by a vote
of the other group members.
*
Page 7
[back to top]
G. Coffee before groups is only for people who are coming to group that night.
It is not for people coming just for socializing.. Exception:
board and committee members on Neutral Ground business
H. Evaluation forms will be handed out in either of the two last group
sessions of an 8 -10 week cycle for members to evaluate their group
experience and provide feedback to their group facilitators. These
forms will be turned over to the Facilitator Coordinators after the
final group session.
K. Outside parties asking to observe groups such as college students
will be considered for access only if such a request is tendered by
letter to Neutral Ground from a teacher, or appropriate authority. This
written request will be voted on by the board and given to the group
facilitator. The final decision regarding access rests with the group
members.
Current open and closed group evaluation forms should be reviewed and
updated periodically.
*
Page 8
[back to top]
V. Membership
A. The membership chairperson is the only one to accept applications
and checks during registration night. He may authorize a deputy to
avoid confusion.
B. Newcomers in financial difficulty may not have their membership fee
waived except in extraordinary circumstances, but they may request that
there initial group fee be waived. Only the president,treasurer, or
Facilitator Coordinator have the authority to waive these fees.
C. Complaints of harassment, or general complaints, shall be treated seriously and
investigated immediately by one Facilitator Coordinator and one board
member, one female and one male if possible. Complaints can be made to
any facilitator or board member. Every effort will be made to handle
the investigation sensitively, ensuring confidentiality, and seeking a
fair resolution of the complaint. (See attached guidelines)
D. The newsletter is sent to new clients free for 3 months. If new
clients do not join Neutral Ground within 3 months, they will be
notified by mail that they will stop receiving the newsletter unless
they join immediately.
*
Page 9
[back to top]
Guidelines for investigating complaints of harassment or general complaints:
The Board member of the investigating team should keep a log book
summarizing each contact during an investigation, noting date and time.
This also would include the resolution of the complaint and follow-up
interviews.
Conducting an investigation, - general rules to follow:
1. Investigate immediately. Delaying or extending an investigation can
make witnesses testimony increasingly unreliable.
2. Treat all claims seriously, even though they seem frivolous, until
you have reason to believe otherwise.
3. Keep the investigation confidential. Emphasize to those involved
that your discussions are not to be shared with unconcerned parties.
Warn of possible disciplinary action, if necessary.
4. Limit the number of persons who have access to the information.
Communicate strictly on a 'need to know' basis.
5. Ask questions so that information is not unnecessarily disclosed.
For example, instead of asking, "did you see Paul touch Joan?" Ask,
"have you seen anyone touch Joan in a way that made her uncomfortable?"
Remember, - the purpose of the investigation is to gather facts, not
imply allegations.
6. If there is more than one allegation, treat each separately. Getting
a member to describe the claim:
1. Listen to the charge. Don't make comments like, "you're
overreacting."
2. Acknowledge that bringing a harassment complaint is a difficult
thing to do.
3. Maintain a professional attitude
4. Gather the facts; don't be judgmental.
5. Ask who, what, when, where, why, and how. Find out if the member is
afraid of retaliation. How does the member want the problem resolved?
Interviewing the complainant:
1. Find out whether there was a pattern of previous episodes or similar
behavior toward another member.
*
Page 10
[back to top]
2. Determine the effect of the conduct on the complainant. Ask
questions about feelings.
3. Determine the time relationship between the occurrence of the
conduct, its effect on the complainant, and the time when the
complainant reported it.
4. Analyze whether their might have been certain events that triggered
the complaint.
5. Determine whether there are any possible motives on the part of the
complainant.
6. Explain to the complainant that the charges are serious, that you'll
conduct a thorough investigation before reaching any conclusion.
7. If the complainant appears to be emotionally upset, spend time with
this member, getting the member to talk about his or her feelings.
Re-telling an upsetting experience can resurrect the feelings connected
with the experience. Stay with the member until it is clear the member
is ready to leave.
Interviewing the accused:
1. Obtain a statement from the accused.
2. Identify the relationship of the accused to the complainant.
3. Was there any prior consensual relationship between the parties? How
long and they known each other? Is there a history of group or
individual socializing?
4. You can expect the accused to deny the charges. Observe the
reaction. Note whether there is surprise, anger, or a disbelief.
Describe the details of the allegation, probe further to determine with
the accused the background, reasons, and motivation that could possibly
trigger the complaint.
Interviewing witnesses:
1. Obtain statements from any witnesses who support or deny any of the
complainant's allegations. Be aware that witnesses are often reluctant
to come forward.
2. Assure all witnesses that their cooperation is important, that their
testimony is confidential, and that we expect them to keep their
interview confidential.
Resolving the complaint:
1. Apologize for the incident occurring, if that is appropriate.
2. Consider the severity, frequency, and pervasiveness of the conduct
when imposing discipline on the perpetrator. There are several
disciplinary options available, including:
*
Page 11
[back to top]
- verbal warning to the effect that if another complaint occurs which
is found to be valid, cancellation of membership and prohibition of
attendance, for a period of time, or permanently, are possible
- outright cancellation of membership or prohibition of attendance for
a period of time, or permanently
- filing of legal charges.
3. When considering the more severe disciplinary actions, the
investigators should consult with the president before delivering their
decision to the perpetrator. They may request the presence of the
president when they meet with the perpetrator to reinforce the
disciplinary action.
4. Investigators shall conduct follow-up interviews with the
complainant and the perpetrator in 1-2 weeks to assess the effects of
the resolution of the complaint. Investigators should report all
complaints, related investigations, and resolutions at the next monthly
Board meeting.
*
Page 12
[back to top]
VI. Newsletter
A. The newsletter is to contain Neutral Ground business and sponsored
events only, unless an exception is made by a vote of the board. The
current President may approve one time additions to the newsletter,
such as stories, poems, etc., just prior to the submission deadline
date which is usually the 15th of every month (5/08).
B. Copies will be made available at Neutral Ground early in the month,
hopefully by the first Thursday of the month.
C. Group business and education must take up half or more of the number
of pages in each newsletter. Social news cannot take up more than half
the pages. This includes social event fliers.
D. The event calendar included in the newsletter contains the current
month. Upcoming future events may be in the calendar or the body of the newsletter.
*
Page 13
[back to top]
VII. Office Telephone Message
A. Professional and welcoming message is the key to encourage persons
to participate in Neutral Ground. This message should include names and
telephone numbers of the members who can provide further information
and crisis counseling phone numbers.
*
Page 14
[back to top]
VIII. Orientation
A. Orientation is to be facilitated by a facilitators who are
experienced in handling hurting people and who are knowledgeable about
Neutral Ground policies and history. There is a limited list of
facilitator's who may facilitate orientation and new facilitators may
be added to that list after receiving special training.
B. All newcomers to Neutral Ground are to attend orientation before
registering for a group.
C. Past members who return to Neutral Ground after five years or more
must attend an Orientation and need not take another first group.
D. The Directory of Self-Help organizations and a list of other sources
of help may be made available to participants by Orientation
facilitators.
*
Page 15
[back to top]
IX. Registration
A. Registration dates are set to avoid events and holidays (of all
faiths), to avoid inconveniencing individuals. Special arrangements
must the made if we create any inequity here.
B. By setting registration dates well in advance we can obtain the use
of Hubbell Hall for best registration procedures.
C. To reduce unnecessary work, those renewing their memberships on
registration night must stand in the membership renewal line first
before standing in line to register for groups.
D. Closed group signup is permitted after registration night until the
second week of each group, if space is available. This is to be decided by the groups facilitator's.
*
Page 16
[back to top]
X. Social Events
A.. No stacks of fliers for outside events without board approval; they are confused with and
compete with our protected events, especially those carefully planned
by our social committee.
B. Currently First Friday dances are a fund raising activity open to
the public.
C. Solicitation of members for outside events or business without board
approval, is prohibited. This includes social events, workshops,
seminars, or any type of personal service.
*
Page 17
[back to top]
XI. Special Programs
A. Avoid scheduling special programs during the 8-10 week closed group
cycles.
B. Special program chairperson will advise the board 2 months in
advance of special programs that have been scheduled. The board must
approve fees to speakers over $300.
*
Page 18
[back to top]
XII. Greeter
A. When the greeter is needed to facilitate Orientation or another
group or needs to leave the church for any reason before 8 p.m., he or
she is to choose a facilitator or an experienced member to cover the
door.
*
Page 19
[back to top]
XIII. Board Officers and Committee Chairpersons
A. Elected officers:
President, Vice President, Treasurer, Secretary
B. Prospective new board members must attend a minimum of two board
meetings before becoming eligible for board membership. Board members
reserve the right to interview prospective board members prior to
voting on their election to the board. The president will appoint three
board members to interview a prospect. Interviews should address the
following areas:
- Whether or not he/she understands the responsibilities of a
board member
- Whether or not he/she can show evidence of support for
Neutral Ground guidelines and principles
- What background and abilities he/she would bring to the
position
C. Any letter sent to the organization's address, any phone message
left on our answering service, any e-mail to our website, or anything
said to a facilitator or a board member regarding a matter to be
addressed by the board, is confidential to the board and any part of
such communication shall not be quoted, discussed, or otherwise
revealed outside the Private communications between and among board
members (6/08).
Appointed board chair positions:
Church liaison
Facilitator Coordinators
Finance Committee
Membership
Newsletter
Public Relations
Administrative Assistant
Registrar
Social Committee
Special Events
Any appointed board chair position may have a co-chairperson appointed.
This person must be recommended to the board by a board member and
approved by a vote of the board.
D. To express gratitude and appreciation to members or board members
for special services, the board can approve a free annual membership or
closed group fee. (9/08)
Created on ... February
1, 2011
